Jan 18, 2012

The Bride Dreams

You know how when something new, big, exciting, and a little terrifying is coming up, and you start to have dreams about it?
Well, let the wedding nightmares begin!

My first wedding nightmare:
A few weeks ago I had a dream that I was back on the beach again with my ADC campers.  I remember thinking: "okay, the wedding is at 2 o'clock, so I'll have to be ready by then!"
Of course, I'm decked out in the lovely box-cut t-shirts, athletic shorts, messy ponytail and bad tan-lines of a camp counselor.  Oddly enough, this didn't phase me until I got a phone call from Todd.
He asked me where I was and if I was ready!
What?! 2:00!! ALREADY?!?
Abandoning my precious campers, I made my way to the gym where, apparently, the wedding was supposed to be held.  I started to get upset because I had not been able to design my invitations or pick out a dress or decorate or anything!  But lo-and-behold, my two bridesmaids (who I can't remember) had picked up a dress for me on their way over.  The dress itself was awful, didn't fit at all, but I couldn't tell them that I hated it!  And to top it off: I smelled like the lake and sweat, I wasn't wearing any make-up, I had abandoned my campers who were all doubtless drowning in the lake, and I had not had any part in the fun of planning my own wedding! Waah!  The last thing I remember was sobbing into the shoulder of poor Todd.
It was a relief that I woke up shortly after this disaster.

Next!
I had this dream right after the day I skipped shaving my legs—something I will doubtless not do again for a long time.
I was at the church (the real location of our wedding), getting ready in the ladies' bathroom with my bridesmaids.  This was shortly after I had purchased my dress and set up the appointment to have it altered to fit me, so in my dream, the dress still didn't fit.  It was much too large, and I kept tripping over it as I struggled to keep the massive folds of fabric on my body!  I also didn't' have shoes!  Where were they?  And HORROR OF HORRORS, I looked down to see that not only were my feet shoe-less, it appeared that I had not shaved my legs in years!
Thus, struggling with so many yards of fabric that my dress was draped over my shoulder ("toga" style, of course), I was trying to shave my hairy-man-legs with a pink razor in the sink of the ladies' bathroom at my church—all of this, just moments before I was supposed to walk down the isle!

Last Week:
At one point this past week, I had a dream that I needed to look through the formal dresses in the basement for a dress that I could wear to the wedding.  My sister was with me, and as we tried to get to the back of the room, we were halted by giant spider webs!  I'm not very fond of spiders, but when conscious, I can get past my fear.  Not so in dreams! I can't STAND them in my dreams.
And of course, I can't seem to kill a dream-spider, so they continue to haunt me until I wake.  These spiders were a little different.  Looking up at the horrid beast as I reached for some of the dresses, I noticed that this particular web was created by a Lego-turtle-spider.  Yep.  A turtle, made of Legos, that was actually a spider, spinning a web.
My wedding was over—I had Lego-turtle-spiders haunting me and I didn't have anything to wear.  Thankfully, I soon woke up and realized how silly I am.

3 comments:

Emily said...

haha katrina i love this/hate it for your sake. i hope the dreams start becoming less... or maybe less nightmarry. also for the record, if you don't shave your legs for a few days, when you do finally shave, your legs will be super smooth so in actuality before your wedding day it may be better to not shave for a bit;) jus sayin haha

Chocolate Lover said...

Hahah, good to know Em, thanks!

Amy said...

oh my word this was hilarious! (in a "i totally know how you feel" type of way. :)